THE PURSUIT OF LOVE

Love bears up under anything {and} everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening] – 1 Corinthians 13:7- AMPLIFIED BIBLE

It is a well stated fact that “everyone wants to be loved”. We all desire it, feel it, see it, hear it and can give it. Aside from the physical support a family renders to its members, a stronger component that bonds everyone into a close knit is the expression of love. It is an undeniable tender affection; an incontainable force which exploits many and any means for expression be it by words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch and gifts. Life is in beautiful shades because of love.

No one can truly say he or she is in love without sacrificing a thing or the other. I must confess many people have given up many valuables in order to spell love for their friends, families, partners, spouses etc. This in itself is good but the impulse behind the action is more crucial. If perhaps you cannot meet a particular need at a particular time, what happens? If on the other hand you indulge in some nasty affairs to please your friend in the name of love, how noble is that? In some other instances, your partner might not appreciate your efforts. What will you do? You might as well have what it takes but perhaps that is not what your partner needs; I know that would not augur well with you.

The first truth I will want to introduce here under the title “Pursuit of Love” is THE PEACE FACTOR. Peace must guide your heart in all you do in your love life. Never be at war with yourself. In plenty and scarcity, let peace rule. Where mountains and valleys are present, life must have peace as the theme. When on the sea or by the coast; carry peace along. A relationship in peace is free from all ills. Never compare yourselves with other pairs; let peace lead. Don’t fabricate lies. Live simple and smart! Avoid cheating. Let peace be the umpire. Where righteousness lives, peace also resides.
And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance forever (Isaiah 32:17) KJV.

Peace is the foundation of a good and lasting love relationship. Learn to flow in the stream of peace. Have a good bath therein. Love then believes the best and gives the best. No good relationship gives credit to hearsay or naysay. For the purpose of this writing, ‘good lover’ and ‘lover’ are one and the same. A lover will not have a slop bucket for ears. He/she filters what is heard or seen before acting or reacting. This is what love pursues – it believes the best in people.

Your marriage will either fly or sink depending on how issues are managed. When you trust your spouse to a fault, it becomes difficult, if not impossible for an individual to talk you into doubting the chastity of your spouse. Photographs, videos, voice records and all sorts of evidence don’t matter. The enemy will take advantage of the doubt, ‘little suspicion’ and envy to trap you into believing your spouse is who he/she is not. When married, the evidence that should really count is one provided by either one of you because you are the only ones in the witness box. John Wesley’s notes on the Old and New Testament commented that love “puts the most favourable construction on everything, and is ever ready to believe whatever may tend to the advantage of any one character.  And when it can no longer believe well, it hopes whatever may excuse or extenuate the fault which cannot be denied.  Where it cannot even excuse, it hopes God will at length give repentance unto life.” This summarily describes good conscience.

Lastly, another pursuit of love is ‘giving the best’. Abel gave God his best. Abraham gave God his best. David gave God his best. Solomon gave God his best. God gave us His best in the person of Christ Jesus. You must do likewise to people and to your lover. Remember if you do it to one of these, you have done it to Him also (Matthew 25:40). In the game of love, you must want to outdo the other. Don’t come into the relationship ‘hungry’ or as a parasite. Have something to give. As a matter of fact, always be willing and ready to give. It may be your time, kind words, prayers, advise, books, warm gestures, gifts and of course money. Explore various means of making burdens lighter, communication smoother and moments pleasurable. Selah.