What Love Really Costs: Gentleness

Gentleness is the Fragrance of Love
How could you love someone and not be gentle towards them? Sometimes the way you find some people who are supposed to be in love with each other behave, it's as if their partner/spouse is their sworn enemy. The harshness with which they cut them when they speak, the tone of audacity with which they dish our orders, the coldness with which they answer them, the dead way they make physical contact in public and the unkind manner with which they say simple things, all go to show that a love education is seriously needed. What is missing is gentleness.

Gentleness is the state of being tender and amiable. Lots of relationships are suffering from the lack of tenderness. The man and woman may be tender and amiable towards people outside but once it comes to relating with each other, hurts and the refusal to forgive trigger a different attitude towards the one they claim to love. Gentleness also means to be of a considerate or kindly disposition. It means to be soft and mild rather than hard or severe. Think about this for a moment.

I once was in a car with a man and his wife. A discussion began as the husband was driving and at a point the wife made a statement and we all laughed. What followed was an unkind joke from the husband about his wife that made me uncomfortable. The wise woman didn't say a single word and nobody laughed. Within me I felt pained as if it was me he had spoken about. When we give ourselves to being gentle towards our loved ones, it affects what we say about them and how we say it.


Gentleness is Not Weakness
To be gentle also means to be docile and easily managed. Some people are so rigid and it's so difficult to bring issues to them or to even discuss simple things with them. They are sudden and steep in their way of talking rather than gradual. Gentleness also means to be friendly, polite and respectful rather than rude. We need more gentle husbands and gentle wives. We need more gentle fiances and gentle fiancées. Love is sweet if we are willing to do it right.

Some people confuse gentleness for weakness. They're not the same. You can be gentle and tough. You can be gentle and strong. Both go well together. In fact, that's how it should be. When you're deliberately training yourself to be gentle, especially towards those you love, you're actually developing strength because only a truly strong person can choose to be kind and polite when the natural flow should have been to be unkind and impolite.

We do not judge strength by how arrogant a person is. No, that's nothing but a display of weakness. We judge a person's strength by how much they're able to give themselves over to the demands of love. Weakness makes many unable to rise up to love's level of life. They've been too given to unkindness that now they lack the strength needed to live a better way.


God's Example of Gentleness
We can never be better than God but we can be more like Him every time. He does not just have love or show love, He is love. You find this aspect of gentleness in God's love. Though we're next to nothing compared to Him, He talks to us and treats us like people of great value. His kindness is never based on how we live or what we do. He shows us kindness because He is kind.

You should take out some time to consider how God deals with us. Notice that He's not in any way touchy or irritable. You've never seen God frown and act strange because you drove Him nuts. He keeps His cool even when we ourselves know that we're so annoying. Our actions and attitudes don't flip His switch. He's cool, calm and collected as ever. We do not change Him. Think about that.

Some of us and so soon angered. If you're that way you need to think about the fact that God doesn't have anger problems. In fact, He's not angry. You've never seen God angry because someone provoked Him. You could not even have stood His anger if you saw it. His anger was poured on Jesus as He hung on the cross. Nobody has done enough things to make you angry half as much as you have done towards God. So, be cool. Take a chill pill and smile it away.

The reason I tell you to think about God's character is because i know you'll resemble what you focus on. The capacity to function like God is in your spirit. Yes, it's within everyone of His children. The life of God in the heart of everyone who has received Jesus Christ into their lives, has enriched them with the ability to be gentle. Here's a call for you to rise above weakness into a new level of strength.

Keep Loving, Keep Living...............LOVE ISSUES
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