So the Big Brother Nigeria show was such a big fuss. I remember watching some clips of its auditioning and some people literally said they would do anything to remain in the house. A particular lady said she would sleep with who ever was at her disposal in order for her to remain in the house. Well, such decadence of moral value but my aim in today's post isn't about the ills such a huge program places on our society and youths, but to bring out a lesson learned.
The show came to an end as Mercy got to win the prize over Mike. Many already speculated that the 'lambo' queen was definitely going to get the prize as she was the queen of entertainment, one trait that anyone who wanted to remain in such a competition should possess. Meanwhile, Mike who didn't have so much of the attributes that Mercy possessed, was more of a respectable newly married man who somehow got into the show after just been married for barely three weeks. Why does something in me believe that the organizers of the show must have talked him into being a part because for crying out loud who leaves his very young marriage, wife for that matter, to be away for over three months?
Anyways, Mike may not have won the prize money but one thing is for sure, he won the hearts of every one who got to watch him and I bet you, that is way beyond having material things and this has made him a man that can't be easily forgotten. So what was it about this young man who despite being in a house of beautiful ladies, where every thing was free, you name it; from free food, to free sex yet he kept himself chaste and disappointed many who thought otherwise for him. Well, I sure will tell you.
Interestingly many young women want such a man to be theirs without wanting to to pay the price and same thing goes for the young men out there. If you were a man reading and you were given the opportunity to be in a house with several young beautiful ladies with no surveillance cameras would you pull it off better than Mike or not? Would you rather be a Miking or Mugu? Yeah, that's what we call men who have no discipline over sexual gratification.
Being Married or being in love isn't sufficient on its own to prevent one from cheating on their spouse or lover. Quite a number of people who have not come to terms with this fact still get it all twisted. No matter how much they profess their love to you, you still have got to look out for some very important attributes to be able to tell if that partner of yours can pull the cheating cord on you. Believe it or not, love(Eros) isn't enough to prevent your partner or spouse from cheating on you. Even having great sex sessions and lots of money showered, it doesn't guarantee that your partner or spouse won't cheat on you. So really, what does?
One of the foremost attribute that makes two love birds stick to each other sexually in marriage is Trust.
Trust is both the reason for love as well as the result of Love. It's the ability to be vulnerable to someone without the slightest fear that such person can damage you emotionally and physically.One may love you because they can trust you and may trust you because they love you; that how powerfully connected love is to trust. If the thought of him or her gives you a cause for concern then it means that the strength of trust is small and if it's not in it's entirety then it's useless. And what's the point going into a life long relationship with someone when you can't trust them entirely?
Trust has a blood relationship with Loyalty which is the ability to keep relationships accountable without any trust issues. It's like the walls of any relationship barricading and protecting it from external assault. A relationship not having a high dose of loyalty from both parties is like a game soon to be over. Loyalty is what says "the grass is never greener on the other side. I rather tend my garden, make it lush and enjoy the fruits all by myself". A person who shows extreme devotion to his spouse or lover will never allow himself to be deceived by what lures others into temptation.
The last but not the least is a combination that I choose to put together. For me there are inseparable because having one is as good as having the other. Unfortunately, many times they are as scarce as a hen's teeth in our men these days and they don't even seem to top the list of specifications from the opposite sex, well except a few. A man of robust character is a man of Integrity. You see, Character and integrity are like two sides of a coin, you cannot separate them. When a man possesses them, you can hardly find a negative trail in his past record.
Integrity means following your moral or ethical convictions and doing the right thing in all circumstances, even if no one is watching you. A man of Integrity will never take advantage of someone's ignorance. A man of Integrity will never commit a despicable act even when no one is watching and more importantly, a man of integrity will always put the interests of the others before his. Having character and integrity makes you stand out and stand tall, it may take long but when the opportunity comes, they make you get the kind of celebration that a king deserves.
Mike stood out at the end of the day not because of his good looks nor his six packs or taut body but majorly because he possessed these attributes. Ladies, if you desire to have a man with firstly these attributes, you can never go wrong and neither will your relationship. Gentlemen, having these attributes in you is what actually makes you a 'gentle-man'. Quit going in the direction of every Tom, Dick and Harry. Develop your self with what truly matter in life to get the best out of it. Choose to be different and awesome for yourself in other for your loved ones and strangers to sing your praise when the time comes. At the end of it all, you become a beacon of hope to others as well as a model of sound inspiration.
P. S. And to those who think Mike should not be celebrated because he did what was expected of him as a husband by not cheating on his wife and upholding their marriage vows in a show as Big Brother Nigeria, so also people who do what is right in an extraordinary way in a failed world/system shouldn't be celebrated either. Now, If you see nothing wrong in the above statement, I'm afraid you need a transformation and a renewing of your hearts eye. Selah.
Your Love Coach,
@thelovejunkie.
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